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Captain's log, stardate 2906-22

Fuck on a skateboard in the middle of space? No problem for Fucknet. Today, my beloved virtual fuck simulator upgraded and offered me a beautiful teen on a skateboard. I had to try this slim pussy right away. I recorded how I took her off the skateboard while riding, and stuck my dick right between her teeth. That was beautiful! A young and incredibly tight pussy was exactly what I needed today. I fucked her, came all over her and sent her back to the skatepark. Base, the skater has a clear thumbs up from me. Captain, over.

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Captain's log, stardate 1806-7

This is not how the Milky Way show has ever been. Control tower, today I went to a rock concert and in a virtual simulator detonated a real load. An incredibly hot rock star, the wild front woman showed me that with a microphone and an electric guitar you can make nice dirty things and what about that dick. In fact, I never experienced such hard rock during my astronaut training. I fucked that sexy bitch and put my microphone in her ass instead of getting her autograph. Rock wins! Captain, over.

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Captain's log, stardate 2704-74

Base, I report that the zombie apocalypse has reached the end of the universe. Even the mischievous artificial intelligence of the ANNA 9000 did not want to trust its own sensors when it saw what I had chosen today as a pleasure for my orphaned dick. Incredibly realistic zombie beauty, horny and determined to suck all the sperm out of me. Using the virtual simulator driver, I nicely teased the hungry beast. I really fucked her hole and sprinkled all the living water from my dick. It was a real zombie massacre! Perverted captain, over.

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Do you know what does 11K means? It’s not a cutting-edge technology. Not the new generation of virtual cell phones. This is scientifically confirmed breast size of the star of the latest episode of Czechcasting!!! Massive boobs with plate-sized areolas! INFUCKINGCREDIBLE! For the first time in the colourful history of Czechcasting, we had to move the camera backwards to make these super-jugs fit into the scene. Natural tits! Made in the Czech Republic! You mustn’t miss them!

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As beautiful as the Barbie doll and sweet as a candy. She likes to play with a hard cock and huge vegetables. She loves munching on hot cum. Barbie, the real one.

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Justice doesn’t mean shit without sin. And Nancy? She’s every fucking sin I ever wanted.

Cigarette burning between her lips. A pistol still warm from the last bastard she shot. And between her legs? A cock thick enough to choke heaven itself. She’s the most dangerous stripper in Fuck City — and the only one I’d let ruin my life.

She knows who I am.
She knows what I’ve done.
And she still wants payback.

But if this fuck gets out of control — and it will — the whole goddamn city’s going down in moans, gunfire, and cum. I’m not here to save it. I’m here to shoot my load into the dirtiest hole in town and pray she lets me live long enough to see her come undone.

Nancy’s worth breaking the law for.
Worth blowing my load on.
Worth rotting in a cell, hard and smiling.

Amen.